Mr Cade Lincoln

by monax


After my fundamentalist father obtained his Masters of Divinity from an institution called Grace Theological Seminary he was given a pastorate and went on to be a founding member of a Christian School named Grace. Neither institution knew much about true grace.

Nevertheless, we children of light were strong and aware. We knew how to fight and we did. Thank Jesus his Holy Spirit helped us discern there was nothing inherently evil with wearing denim blue jeans and facial hair.

Grace students were not permitted to wear blue jeans, not even to sporting events off school campus. The same dress code was expected of parents too.

So I’m in 5th grade. Thankfully it was my last year there. And it was nighttime about this time of year because there was snow falling and we were at a school basketball game hosted in the gymnasium of a local church. I was there because a boy in my class was having a birthday party and sleep over that night with about eight of us classmates.

Well, we boys were bored with the basketball game and decided to go outside and play in the falling snow. It was a riot. The snow was wet and packed remarkably well so we had a snowball fight between ourselves. But somehow Mr Cade Lincoln—I call him this because his name was Mr Cade, and he also was very tall and thin and dressed up as Abe Lincoln every Presidents Day—well, somehow this teacher had sniffed a transgression in the air and came out to find it. Just as no blue jeans could be worn, no snowballs could be thrown. So he ordered us to stop.

And just like my name sake I knew this goliath had to be silenced. There was no way in hell this stiff legalist was gonna crush my spirit with his assumption of authority off school grounds. Don’t get me wrong, I was a respectful kid. However, If I hadn’t fought back I would have probably lost my mind. So as this thin giant walked away I threw my wet snow ball— splat— in the back of his head. And we all cheered and ran.

When the dad of our birthday boy came to pick us up in his station wagon we all piled in and the boys immediately and excitedly proceeded to tell this pastor and father what I had done. I thought I was in trouble. But he turned to me, smiled, and said, “Good for you, David. Good for you.”

There were good people there at Grace, but there were also the Mr Cade Lincolns.

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related post: Who are the Children of Light?